cooking

Frittering As A Lifestyle

I was afraid I was frittering away my life

so I decided to learn all I could about making frittatas.

For months on end I experimented with oven-topped, baked, and even broiled.

Although traditionally served for breakfast and brunch,

I also frittated for lunch, dinner, snacks, buffets, receptions, and even tailgate parties,

but one day after fraternizing with fellow frittata eaters,

I came to the realization that there was a void in my essence.

Thus once again presently and probably forever

full time I am preparing and eating

among others

apple, banana, peach, corn, zucchini, cauliflower, cheese, ham, lobster, and clam fritters.

 

 

 

 

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Swanson’s Chicken Pot Pie

Swanson’s Chicken Pot Pie,

What’s not to like about it?

The crust that is thin and rubbery

The ultra salty chicken cubes that seem like they’ve been glued together

The potatoes, peas, and carrots that turn to mush

The starchy gloopy gravy

So you can see I’m not crazy about that Chicken Not Pie.

 

If You Like This Thank Me But If You Hate It Thank The Three Stooges

My wife was in bed with a headache

So I decided to go all out for her sake.

I used foie gras, caviar, white truffles, smoked salmon, prawns, and camembert,

all things that I thought would bring her some cheer

but when I presented her with this elegant platter of canapes

she frowned and groaned

What are these?

I asked for a can of peas!

 

A Rare Bit Of Advice

Normally I don’t interfere in other people’s eating habits,

but here is a rare bit of advice from me to you.

Mostly cheese, cream, and bread

so full of carbs and lipids,

although I must admit its taste it’s said is not insipid,

in this day and age you’d have to be out of your head

to even take a rare bite out of old fashioned Welsh Rarebit.

 

 

Chicken Nuggets

Chicken Nuggets seem to have many fans who before they eat them

they hugget

and oftentimes when having their cellular pictures taken with them

they mugget

but as for me I’m indifferent

they don’t seem bad but definitely nothing special

thus when I see them

I just shrugget

so if you don’t share yours with me

I wouldn’t grudget.