Traditional Thai fried rice is a delight
Highlighted by oyster sauce, fish sauce, and Thai basil,
but there’s an American version dating back to the Vietnamese incursion
That turns a wonderful authentic dish into a perversion.
You see on the side is added a fried chicken wing, a slice of grilled ham, and a spliced hot dog
Along with a ketchup blob.
For five years working in Bangkok I wanted to be made to feel welcome
but due to that fright rice
I was the one saying Yankee go home.
Until July 2 no more Trump verse
or any others for better or worse
’cause I’m going to Boston without access to any computer
but will be thinking of plenty while I’m a train commuter
Unless of course I don’t get to see my first cedar waxwing
Then I’ll mindlessly drop everything as that would be too taxing.
I had been told chorizo with its special flavoring and spicing
When fried would result in a most enjoyable food tasting.
I really wish something had been said about removing the casing.
Rules upon rules they keep adding ad nauseum!
Guess I won’t be going to that museum
as I’m not ready to be a resident of a mausoleum.
Natural pistachios are like a gift from heaven
While the hellishly messy red dyed I doubt if even the devil has tried.
In huge gatherings
Hordes are all agog
About the self-serving blatherings
Of this fraud of a demagogue.
To explain it I wish it were as easy to say they all had downed too much grog
and their minds are in a fog.
Boston prides itself on proclaiming the city to be the Universe’s Hub
but even with universities galore they can’t get it right about their grub:
Scrod is really cod.
What they pretentiously call a frappe everyone else calls a milkshake.
A tonic in a Boston accent in Austin is just sodah pop like Cocah Colah.
Jimmies are generously sprinkled on top of ice cream as chocolate sprinkles should be.
To call it Boston Cream Pie is a layered lie as it’s a custard filled chocolate frosted cake.
There’s no pig in a Stuffed Quahog as this hard-shelled clam would attest.
For goodness sake what’s corn doing in a Clam Bake?
It’s hard to find a submarine sandwich there but not a look alike taste alike grinder.
So if you ever go to Boston this verse about it’s quirky culinary names
Is an off the wall food finder reminder.
My oh my
I’m so shy
Although my dumplings are worth sampling and then some
I won’t show you my shao mai
So alone I may chow on a large sum of those dim sum.
When I was very young
I discovered that mixing a certain proportion of orange soda to root beer
Tasted just like Aspergum
but to my despair
While it did nothing for my headache
It made my tongue quite numb
and caused some of my hair to disappear.
I’ve never been very lucky in making latkes
as they end up lumpy
and full of grease
That even with plenty of apple sauce or sour cream
They remain a stack of yuckies.